“YOUR GRANDMOTHER ALWAYS FAVORED YOU.”
“You told us Grandma left you money.”
Mom’s eyes flashed.
“I said she wanted all of you taken care of.”
“No,” Lena said. “You said she left you money.”
Mom looked at me.
“Margot lived with her.”
“YOU TOLD US GRANDMA LEFT YOU MONEY.”
There it was.
“You had Grandma,” she said. “My girls didn’t.”
Phoebe looked at her.
“Your girls?”
Mom ignored that.
“You got years of help from her. You lived there for free. She paid for things. She saved for you while I was raising two children.”
“YOU GOT YEARS OF HELP FROM HER.”
I stared at my mother.
“Grandma wasn’t payment for losing my mother.”
She flinched.
“Don’t twist this.”
“I’m not.”
“You always act like you were the only one who went without something.”
“GRANDMA WASN’T PAYMENT FOR LOSING MY MOTHER.”
“I was four.”
“I was young too!”
Mom looked from one daughter to another.
Then she tried again.
“You had Grandma. They had me.”
“Those weren’t equal things you got to trade.”
“I WAS YOUNG TOO!”
“I didn’t say they were.”
“You just did.”
Mom gripped the little bag.
“I intended to replace some of it.”
“With what?”
She looked away.
“The car?”
No answer.
“I INTENDED TO REPLACE SOME OF IT.”
“The laptops?”
Phoebe stared at her own hands.
“I didn’t know.”
“I know you didn’t.”
Lena opened the bag she had brought and pulled out her laptop.
“Sell it.”
“I KNOW YOU DIDN’T.”
Mom blinked.
“What?”
“Sell mine. Put the money back.”
Phoebe spoke immediately.
“Mine too.”
“No.”
Both sisters looked at me.
“You don’t owe me what she bought you.” Then I looked at Mom. “She does.”
“SELL MINE. PUT THE MONEY BACK.”
Mom’s face turned pale.
“So what now? You’re going to report me?”
“I already asked the bank about challenging the withdrawal.”
“You’re doing this to your own mother?”
“You went to the bank first.”
“YOU’RE GOING TO REPORT ME?”
“Margot, I had access to that account.”
“That doesn’t make the money yours.”
“I was going to fix it.”
“When?”
She had no answer.
“Sell the car,” I said.
Her head snapped up.
“What?”
“I WAS GOING TO FIX IT.”
“Start putting it back.”
“I need a car.”
“You needed that car?”
She looked at the polished vehicle behind her.
The answer was obvious.
Her voice lowered.
“If you keep doing this, you’re going to tear this family apart.”
“START PUTTING IT BACK.”
Lena spoke before I could.
“Which family?”
Mom turned toward her.
Lena didn’t look away.
Mom looked down at Grandma’s brown coat button in her palm.
Then she closed her fingers around it.
“WHICH FAMILY?”
Mom eventually opened her hand and gave me Grandma’s button.
“I need to go back inside.”
Nobody stopped her.
Lena watched her leave.
“Well.”
Phoebe looked at me.
“What happens now?”
NOBODY STOPPED HER.
“I don’t know.”
It was the first honest answer any of us had received all morning.
***
We went to Grandma’s house.
I needed to start sorting her things, and somehow my sisters came with me.
Phoebe found the patched brown coat hanging beside the back door.
WE WENT TO GRANDMA’S HOUSE.
“Grandma wore this at Christmas.”
“Every Christmas.”
She touched one patch.
“Why didn’t she buy another one?”
“She kept saying this one still worked.”
Lena was quiet.
“GRANDMA WORE THIS AT CHRISTMAS.”
Then she asked, “Why didn’t you ever come on vacation with us?”
“I didn’t know I was invited.”
Her head lifted.
“We asked Mom.”
“She never asked me,” I said.
Phoebe sat down.
“Mom said Grandma didn’t like us staying here.”
“I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS INVITED.”
I stared at her.
“Grandma kept asking why you never did.”
Phoebe looked down at the table.
Eventually, Lena opened one of Grandma’s photo boxes.
We sat around the kitchen table looking through pictures.
It was awkward.
“GRANDMA KEPT ASKING WHY YOU NEVER DID.”
We weren’t suddenly three inseparable sisters.
We had too many missing years for that.
But for once, Mom wasn’t standing between us explaining what somebody else supposedly felt.
***
Four days later, she called me.
“I listed the car.”
I sat down.
“Okay.”
WE WEREN’T SUDDENLY THREE INSEPARABLE SISTERS.
“When it sells, I’ll start replacing the money.”
“Good.”
“That’s all you’re going to say?”
“It’s what you should’ve done, Mom.”
She went quiet.
“Does this fix anything?”
“No.”
“DOES THIS FIX ANYTHING?”
“Can it?”
I looked at Grandma’s empty chair.
“I don’t know.”
Another pause.
“Can I come over?” she asked.
Lena and Phoebe were in Grandma’s kitchen with me.
“Not tonight.”
“I DON’T KNOW.”
Mom didn’t argue.
After we hung up, Phoebe picked up the birthday card I’d taken to the bank.
The final deposit receipt was still inside.
“She really did this every year?”
“Every year.”
“A thousand dollars?”
THE FINAL DEPOSIT RECEIPT WAS STILL INSIDE.
“Whatever she could manage.”
Lena looked at me.
“Are you still going back to nursing school?”
“Yeah.”
“How?”
I ran my thumb along the edge of Grandma’s card.
“I’ll figure it out.”
“ARE YOU STILL GOING BACK TO NURSING SCHOOL?”
Phoebe glanced at the patched coat.
“Did Grandma ever spend money on herself?”
I smiled.
“She liked good coffee.”
Lena laughed.
A minute later, Phoebe pulled another photograph from the box.
“SHE LIKED GOOD COFFEE.”
“Margot.”
I leaned over.
All three of us were in it.
I was maybe eleven. Lena was little, Phoebe barely more than a toddler.
Grandma stood behind us with one hand on my shoulder.
ALL THREE OF US WERE IN IT.
I didn’t remember the photograph being taken.
I took the photograph from Phoebe.
Then I placed it beside Grandma’s last birthday card, with the things I was keeping.
